Blaming other people

If you say, “I know why I have no money. My boss doesn’t pay me enough!” Will that help? Is it likely you’ll ever save money?

While we blame other people, we usually do little to fix the situation. So we keep the problem.

Fred says, “I haven’t got any friends. Nobody understands me!” That’s avoiding responsibility. While Fred blames everyone else, he’ll have a lot of lonely Saturday nights.

Mary says, “I know I’m miserable. It’s my mother’s fault.” That’s a recipe for more misery. Blaming your mother doesn’t help.

Whenever you fail at something, ask yourself, “Was I partly responsible for this? How can I make sure this doesn’t happen again?” These are questions successful people ask themselves.

It’s Not What Happens To You; It’s How You See It

Case 1: John Foppe was born with no arms. He holds a masters degree in communication and he gives presentations to companies and schools around the world. He never asks, “Why was I born without hands?” He asks himself: “What am I going to do about it?”

Everything you do with your arms – comb your hair, count your money, steer a car – he does with his feet. It’s fun to eat with John in a Chinese restaurant. While other diners are eating with knives and forks -figuring chopsticks are too hard – John handles chop-sticks like a champion – between his toes!

Says John, “I accept who I am. Without the challenges I have had, I wouldn’t be the same person.”

Case 2: Tony Christiansen is a qualified surf lifeguard, a champion swimmer, a second-degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do, a speedway and racing car champion, a qualified pilot, a successful businessman and a father of three children. Tony has no legs. He lost them in a railway accident when he was nine.

Tony’s philosophy? Never say, “I can’t.”

So long as you believe something in your life is a disaster,
it will unfold as a continuing disaster.

Let’s say your Dad suddently announces to the family, “I’ve got a new job. We’re all moving to Peru!”

You say, “Oh no! I’ll lose all my friends. My life is ruined! Where can you get a decent hamburger in Peru?” As long as you think that your life is in ruins, you will be miserable.

Then one day you change your point of view. You decide, “This is an adventure most kids never get! I’ll get to learn Spanish. I’ll learn to eat different food! Maybe my friends can come and visit me!”

You change your attitude and it changes your life.

In a nutshell:

Every “disaster” in your life is not as much a disaster as a situation waiting for you to change your mind about it.